Do You, Boo: A Guide for Being Unapologetically You

We all want to live in ways that let us feel authentic and real. In reality, though, making mistakes or (gasp!) encountering people who just don't vibe with us energetically can easily send us into a spiral of self-doubt. Difficult as it may seem sometimes, there's nothing more real than letting the authentic you shine through in all your interactions. Here's how you can turn living unapologetically into second nature.

Show Yourself Some Love

Living your truth starts with loving yourself. From embracing body positivity to working in smaller acts of self-care on a day-to-day basis, the way you treat yourself has big implications for acting with authenticity in every part of your life.

All too often, we're our own worst enemy. Catch a bad look in the mirror, start reliving that awkward moment with your crush over and over in your own head ... Look, we get it. Loving yourself is hard AF sometimes! So, how do you start showing yourself some self-love? Try working a few simple tricks into your daily routine to build up your confidence:

• Praise yourself: Resist the urge to skip out on this step just because it feels silly. When you do something scary or hard, shower yourself with praise. It's even helpful to use your name when you're doing this, like: "You rocked that presentation, [insert your name here]!" Need a BoPo boost? Compliment your favorite features, from your hair to your booty. 
• Be mindful of how you speak to yourself: You need to realize the ways you're being unkind to yourself before you build up your self-compassion. Identify times when you tend to fall into patterns of self-criticism so you can push those negative thoughts away with intention.
• Forgive your own mistakes: Remind yourself that you're human and mistakes don't make you a bad person. Show yourself the same compassion you would have for a best friend.

Knowing how to see the difference between working hard and being too rough on yourself can be tough, so you can even get some psychic advice to pinpoint areas of your life where you should start showing yourself some more kindness.

Recognize the Power of Self-Compassion

Okay, so you're ready to commit to acting more compassionately toward yourself. To really make your new practice work, it's important to understand WHY self-compassion is so crucial to being the best version of yourself. It's not enough to just try to boost your self-esteem (though, naturally, that's necessary too). You have to really, put effort into being kinder to yourself.

Practicing self-compassion makes you more comfortable owning your mistakes and imperfections. Admitting your own faults can lead to resilience, more tolerance for taking risks, and overall better outcomes. Look, no one's perfect. But when you can look at things you've done wrong or need to improve with real compassion, you empower yourself to take those steps toward self-improvement. At the same time, looking at your total self, faults and all, and loving that whole person is key to being unapologetically you.

Own Your Personality

You ARE your best self, so live it. Let yourself be shy, or outgoing, or really, really into that hobby you think others find strange. Your quirks and traits make you ... well ... you, and anyone who really loves you will appreciate the whole package. And (yep, see steps one and two), that love starts with showing yourself some love.

Honor Your Values

Knowing yourself inside and out and being comfortable in your own skin is key to putting your best self forward. Practicing daily self-reflection, awareness,  and honoring those things you find important is a great way to start. If you value something (no matter how big or small) then it's valid — even your love for psychic readings! 

It's also important to address moments that make you feel off balance or uncomfortable, whether that be in a social setting or at work. Instead of avoiding or deflecting this feeling, take a moment to reflect on WHAT made you uncomfortable. For example:

• What exactly happened?
• What people were involved in the situation?
• What subjects did you talk about?
• What actions did others encourage you to take?

Try to figure out the moment when you felt like you were an imposter in the encounter. Then, it's time to make a decision. Will you put yourself in a similar situation but take a different approach, or will you try to totally avoid those types of encounters?

There's no right or wrong answer here, just as long as you're doing what feels right to you. If you do decide you'll be present in that type of social situation again, make sure you're ready to opt out if other people's actions make you uncomfortable. You can also share your opinions, likes, and beliefs respectfully with everyone else there. You may even get more respect than you're expecting.

Make Smart Decisions About the People Around You

On that note, you'll want to surround yourself with folks who value the real you, too. If people are constantly putting you down, they're not the right peeps to help nurture your authentic truth. Likewise, you can't let pushy people determine your agenda. (They can turn into great teachers when it comes to learning how to set boundaries and reclaim your unapologetic truth, though!)

Instead of shrinking away, overreacting, or just plain caving into the pressure others put on you, practice saying "no." Learn how it feels when you don't take other people's agendas on as your own. Remember, it's okay to say no. The word "no" doesn't change the kind, compassionate, overall bomb human that you are.

Boo, you're ready to take on the world once you start fully embracing your authentic self. Need some specific steps you can take in your own unique situation? Get a Psychic reading at PathForward to start on your journey to real self-love.